Throughout the years of my life, I have had experiences that could have easily been spread over several lifetimes, such concentrated lessons in a succession of events that seemed at points to be the very end of the experience in this body. That’s how strongly their pain has been felt.
An external observer would be unable to assess the true vastness and range of experiences, as many of the recent events that touched me were mostly internal battles, inner struggles and processes of transmutation. I am amazed by the fact that I am still here, back again from my inner infernal places, able to write about it all.
I have risen and fallen so many times. I have reached heights of understanding and realizations that I am still surprised I managed to grasp, and at points I was deprived (I forgot) of all that knowledge and wisdom, and even been pushed again to plunge so deep back into the very depths of my shadowy self, to the very abyss that we are all trying to pretend it exists not within our hidden chambers. And yet here I am, all scarred, dusty and almost lost, found again with a true smile on my face and unlimited gratitude to the Grace of the Eternal that manifested through people, events and the entire movements of the gears of Life and its incredible stories and twists.
Such an amazing game of hide and seek we’re playing with ourselves. Such a great example of the living paradox that is a Soul exploring the lower material plane, such a trap, so cunning this construct and so incredibly booby-trapped at every step. Everything yells for our attention and energy, everything is doing its utmost to steal some juice(energy) from us one way or another, to keep us blind, stumbling in mediocrity. It’s indeed a war, but not with any external forces, but with internal self-created demons who are fighting to preserve and defend the status quo, to try and ensure the survival of the old paradigms of control and their self-preservation.
I am living a true miracle, but only now do I recognize it as such. My old self would scoff and roll his eyes in disbelief and hopelessness, as probably the reaction of the majority of people who ever met me. My “miracle” may look like nothing or even like a scary thing for the unadvised. The simplicity of it all is almost impossible to grasp by the overcomplicated reasoning mechanism of the limited mind bound to old concepts. Even I have fallen back to old paradigms so many times, unable to hold onto the realization of the truth.
I am! I truly feel that these 2 words and 3 letters are all encompassing, like the primordial particle out of which everything sprouted out. “I am” is realized in silence.
The silence and its power are often times misunderstood and disregarded. Yet when you dare facing it, embracing it, it’ll talk to you and you will Know! When you embrace the “boredom” of staying in silence with yourself, the whole Universe will reveal its hidden song, the song of Life and Love, the song that reminds us that we are One, that we are enough, and it is in every single moment of Now that we are always wholesome and perfect.
When we embrace what we used to run away from, we will be able to get all the missing parts of the puzzle that we were searching for only in our comfort zone. Such a fallacy, to look for knowledge and wisdom only where we expect it to be, as silly as being on a bridge and losing a precious object in the river, yet deciding to look for it on the bridge to avoid wetting our clothes.
Truth and pieces of it are found in the places that we least expect. One of this “places” is the silence. What’s ignored, and disregarded, has hidden in it some juice that can’t be found elsewhere. Dare to turn each stone in your life upside down with courage and determination, and you will hear the silence that speaks, that sings and that guides.
My deepest gratitude to my Guru and the entire Higher realm that protects and guides us!
Inspired by and dedicated to Jivanmukti and Siddha Param-Para 