Are we aware in our personal life?
Can you love everyone just for existing exactly how you may love your own pet?
Do you love your favorite cat because is doing something or performing in a certain way or you just love her for who she truly is, regardless of the moments of destroying some objects furniture by scratching them, besides of the fact that it may scratch you or bite you? No matter how angry you are at a certain moment in time because of this happenings, eventually you will realize that it’s just an animal with its limitations, and you will forgive whatever like nothing happened.
If so why are you so rough with people, with your own partner, family members. Don’t they deserve at least the same treatment and maybe more? Why can’t you do that? Because you had certain expectations? Maybe it’s time to realize that it’s useless to have expectations if you are really dedicated to own evolution. Understanding the (lower) human nature, that everyone is impredictable, animal-like, unaware of others or self on a very deep level… The best solution to solve the problems and “dramas” is to accept whatever like you accept when the dog or the cat pooped on your favorite carpet. After all, everything is repairable, the carpet can be cleaned and washed or even replaced. What can it be so hard for us to accept others mistakes? Are we free of mistakes, or better to say, have we done it (the mishap) ourselves at any point in time? If so would you like to receive the same treatment that you are offering to the person that is at fault? If we take time before choosing to act in a certain manner, many of our problems wouldn’t exist.
If we are aware enough and honest with ourselves, we may able to recall moments when a big drama was created out of some really laughable(now) reason.
Some people divorced out of a so-called difference of opinion. It’s bullshit because if there’s love and full awareness in there, there can never be such a thing because people who love each other, compromise. And the funny thing is that they don’t even feel like compromising. But when love fades away the capacity of the person to compromise diminishes and the one who’s love diminished more will start putting pressure on the other, starting to “feel a foul smell” out of everything that the other is doing. If you are doing that can you really realize that you are a co-creator of your dramas? Are you able to be honest with yourself and realize that if you are stopping fueling the incipient “fire” (arguments, reproaches..), then the entire drama will disappear? If you are not able to stop yourself from adding fuel onto the fire by creating more pressure and discontentment, then why do you expect the other to do it?
I come back to one of my previous writings about nonviolence, whatever happens, if you manage to approach that in a non-violent way, you are the promoter of peace. If something goes wrong there are always multiple choices of reacting. The most common is: how dare you doing… Or… I thought you have more brain into your head not to do… Wtf is wrong with you… These are all ways of creating a monster scandal which many times degenerates in extreme violence or unfortunate events.
Another way of reaction can be: what’s done its done, let’s see how can we repair the problem, if there’s no way to undo it. You can choose to go with the “little self” which may push you to accuse, blame, shame the other, or you can choose to forgive, as you will forgive the dog that pooped under the kitchen table.
So the real question you should ask yourself is: Am I really the victim in here or I am the very aggressor? Many victims are first aggressors because they are unable to comprehend that they are co-creators of the whole thing. If you would calm yourself down and say intelligent things in a calm voice, trying to find solutions instead of blaming, there can be no drama whatsoever.
I read somewhere on the internet that: If the problem wouldn’t matter in 5 years from now on, then you shouldn’t give it more than 5 minutes of your time now.
Drama is addictive, you may unknowingly end up with wanting more, creating and/or feeding with your energy these conflicts, just because the love that was there, started to diminish or totally disappeared. No need to create anything. Realize that you have to either split with that partner, but not running away from life, or diving deep into the relationship, removing the desire to control, surrendering to life itself with the decision to make it work.
Your personal life behavior will always reflect onto your decisions in the society, so you may try to exercise your motherlike new way of approaching your family life and eventually you will be able to apply it into the macro scale as well.
I wish you all readers to reach out to your maximum potential during this lifetime!